Thursday, 4 July 2013

Depression affects all

Depression affects all kinds of people, those who have nothing, loads who have a medium life working but they feel they have no prospects to do anything else, and those who appear to have everything.

There is a programme starting next week on BBC 3 about footballers who have battled with depression and Gary Speed's sister talks about how she wished she had been able to let Gary confide in her for help. Gary Speed did appear to have the world at his feet, he was doing well has Wales International Manager, very well respected and high regarded through the world, had two sons who also were doing well and a glamorous gorgeous wife.

I do think more help should be out there and support of those suffering with depression, as a lot of the time they won't speak to those close to them about it, as they feel that they won't understand or some say it's just having a bad day.

Depression is more deeper than just a bad day, it is a illness that can strike at any time, it can make you feel like your falling down a hole that you see no way out of, and so people take their lives because they can't see a way out of the emotional demon "Depression".

With depression comes the appearance to people that all is good to the world to the outside when they see or chat to people they know, to not show that something is wrong. This is where the mind can go into overtime and feel like a roller-coaster of thoughts, all bad and you try to reason to yourself about things you have but you feel they would be better of without you.

You can feel that you don't have the energy to do anything and just want to hide away from the world.

So I would like to say to those who have like myself gone through a stage of depression, is that you are not on your own and there is always a good way out to rebuild your life so you know longer have to feel like your falling down that dark depression hole.

You will always have my support.

Many thanks for reading.

Carrie X

Monday, 10 June 2013

The Special One

Being a Football Coach and running a football team is not easy but it can be rewarding.

I knew at the age of 11 I wanted to be a football coach and always dreamed even now of running a big side and sitting in the dugout in a proper stadium, but now I am coaching it is a lot different to how you think it is but I did prepare myself that it was not going to be easy.

I what I want to write about is you always have that one parent who thinks his son or daughter when participating in sport is the "Special one".

I think it is good for a parent to be supportive of her boy or girl, and if it is something they like doing to pursue and help them learn by playing for a team, but I don't like the parent who thinks his son is the "Special one" and no matter to the others boys should be given special treatment and awards.

However, this particular parent can also be the one who yells and very aggressive sometimes than anyone else on the touchline during matches and even calls their own son rubbish out load. They can also be the over friendly one and helpful so they can try and influence your decision goes her son or daughter's way no matter show this effects the other boys and parents. I understand that you can't help but be passionate because even the kids matches can be exciting but a few do forget they are children and what is obvious to an adult who has watched or played football a lot longer and even myself is not obvious to them as they only really at the early stages still of development, in terms of thinking and improvising, knowing where to be, where to pass and where to be looking.

If it was that obvious you wouldn't need a coach to teach them and I also think it can damage their confidence, if you talk to them as they are ridiculous, I know because I was that child who's parents words did have implications of how I felt about myself and did have a lot to play in my lack of confidence. Not saying I blame them or saying it is all their fault, but a parents words can play a huge part in how we feel and think of our selves.

The particular parent who they see their boy or girl as the "Special one" is also the someone as I recently experienced who wanted to vote for her own son as player of the year, not realising how wrong this is. If I allowed that to have happened no boy would win as I would have 10 different votes, and so I made it fair so they all voted for another player and then went with the majority. This also teaches about Sportsmanship. The boy who did win the player of the year award did deserve it as he is a very quiet boy but gets on with it, doesn't kick off when things don't go his way, and even when the other boys were unhappy about playing in bad weather he wanted to still carry on.

The boy who "The special one" I do think a lot of as he has improved in heaps and bounds, but he did kick off a lot when things didn't always go his way and played up a lot of the time in training, and gave up during matches, which the parent knew. This is because they would often ask me to take him off as he had a bad day so they knew that their son wasn't the ideal good boy player, but I learnt a lot from him and that is he just wants space to play and be a boy, he takes no notice of his parent who shouts and hollers at him during those matches, and if I was him I wouldn't too as they are not nice to him when he is playing.

He can score goals and kick a ball but it is about more than that, and needs to learn as so this particular parent should do too, it is about the team not an individual and what is fair. When the boy of parent of the "Special one" didn't win another extra trophy moaned because she thought that he should have been, because he did score a lot of goals, but I didn't award goal scorer of the year because it wouldn't be fair to the goalkeeper who would never win this award. I chose an extra award that they all got a chance of winning and then they all got the same trophy each for their contribution, so I didn't let them go home with nothing as they all did well last season.

Anyway, I do feel that this is just one out of 10 parents and most have been supportive and helpful, but it just a shame then that one person can spoil it for the rest.

Many thanks for reading.

Carrie X

Sunday, 12 May 2013

Dropped my guard

This last weekend started of exciting as I went to see one of my favourite TV programmes Loose Women and then it all went wrong.

Me and my hubby ordered a take away and used one of our favourite trusted places but they delivered the wrong food, but did work out well in the end as when the right order turned up he didn't want the other one (the wrong order) back and so we ended up with two, so we had part of the other order today the chicken, but also a cheque that I had been waiting for had not turned up and one of my Ebay sells went wrong as they stated it was delivered all torn up and an item was missing from the parcel, even though I had sent it all nicely packaged and sent on the same day bought.

Then I find out that a Spam message was sent out as if from me on Twitter. I know that there are hackers and people out there who aren't honest out there but because of having a lot of followers on twitter and have built a good connection with loads of people I did kind of drop my guard quite bit, it has taught me a lesson.

Life is about learning from mistakes and things that go wrong.

However it has really affected my confidence and made me realised that I do have to be careful and now have put tight security on my twitter account and I am going to have a break from Social Media to recharge and rebuild my confidence with this. It is true what Tony Robbins says in his book I am reading at the moment, when something goes wrong for you in a particular place or website or even had a bad reaction to certain food, that you build up an association of pain with that particular thing and that is what has happened. Since the issue with Ebay even though it was one out of 12 people who I have sold and sent products bought from me too, that I now weary of using Ebay to sell items again, especially as I know other people whom have had bad experiences on Ebay and not long ago witnessed a young girl being bullied on Facebook by someone who had sent a Spam mail via Facebook chat and hacked into someone elses account appearing as if it was from them.

Thankfully this has stopped and I hope whoever was doing that was punished.

As I am writing this blog I am thinking that I don't want to let these unhonest spiteful people who do scams on websites, or break into peoples parcels and who hack into peoples website accounts to win as the only way to fight these people is to report them and to build up your guard so your details and messages and website accounts are protected, but still carry on and remember the positives things that have happened and the nice messages I have received from honest people like myself on twitter and on facebook and Ebay too.

If you too are scammed or had issues with Ebay then do report it and do protect your details, as those people who do hack into peoples items and information need to be stopped.

Many thanks for reading.

Carrie X

Wednesday, 1 May 2013

Ignore the doubters

This is a subject that I have written about before in a blog I did about people who judge before you've even shown them what you can do.

Now I want to write about the doubters, those who doubt your ability, when you tell them that you are taking a new project, or creating a new business; God forbid don't tell them that there is a set up fee, because you might aswell give them a hammer to hit you over the head with, and completey destroy the  enthusiasm you have.

I am now beginning my own adventure and before I told my doubter, I was full of enthusiasm, but what I trust is my inner self, I know if it is a bad idea or not, and as some have little faith in what I do due to passed mistakes I do my research before I do anything.

Life is about making mistakes and it has taught me a lot, but also watching and being inspired by other people has also taught that you have to take that risk sometimes.

If you don't take that opportunity when will you?

So even though the doubter may be doing it to protect you it can also be sole destroying, if someone tells me of an idea they have I support and I say "Great, just do your research and let me know if you have any % help" that gives the person who tells you and a boost, because your not doubting or destroying their high feelings your saying you think this is great, but also giving your protective advise going on your own mistakes to help them not make the same mistakes as yourself and giving your support, which is the greatest thing you can give to someone who has an adventure they what to pursue. Doubters just give me more fighting power to succeed and I can say "Look I know it was a risk but look it has paid off".

But so what if you haven't or takes a while?

I say learn from this and keep trying.

I loving the fact that what I do now I am in charge of and that it is up to me to go out there and connect with people to show that I am in it for me and to connect with them and to make those doubters I have to change their mind.

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

Tuesday, 23 April 2013

New Begnnings and challenges

Since being made redundant I have hit some highs and lows, but I know that it is a chance to start a new chapter in my life and start some new beginnings.

I have now got more time with my husband, see family and not having to work around another company's schedule, I can work around my own. I am now not only running my Avon business but now going to be growing and building another business and promoting Forever Living products.

I have been using the Aloe Moisturising Lotion, which I will be writing a review on soon, on a brand new blog I will be setting up, as I love naturally made products as what has not helped with my self confidence is the issues I have had with my skin, as I often get dry and champed skin especially on my hands and so instead of getting down about it, I now take it upon myself to sort it out and to change it, as only I can. I am really excited I will be meeting my new team tomorrow who will be helping me and I know this will help me with my Women's Football Fitness project too and gain the confidence to build my own development and build a foundation amongst other strong, confident and ambitious people.

I have also booked myself onto a free Personal Coaching course to also further my skills for my own development and to connect with other people to help develop their skills in confidence building using all the tools and skills I have learnt.

When you have suffered with a lack of self confidence it can often creep back and even when doing my Avon I feel the self confidence negative thoughts coming into my mind, but I have to push these aside and remind myself of the strengths I have and the knowledge and skills I have developed and built.

It is you, yourself that is responsible for developing yourself and changes you decide to make, and no one else. If you lack self confidence people can see this and it can spread onto them to doubt you too, so show yourself and everyone around you of what you are capable of and you too can create new chapters in your life for a new beginning.

Many thanks for reading.

Carrie X

Friday, 29 March 2013

The Words of Wisdom

Do you ever get knocked down by your friends or family when it comes to your own ideas, who advise not to do something, not really criticising but like warn you of the reasons why you shouldn't?
Then this knocks your confidence and the adrenaline boost you were having as you were building the ideas of what you wanted to do in your head?

I am running my own business at the moment and constantly I have people advising oh you shouldn't do that or this, and questions what you are doing because it is something that they wouldn't do. I appreciate that there are people whom wouldn't do it and are warning to protect me but I think you have to learn by your own mistakes, you have to fly by yourself sometimes and take those risks. You will never know what is out there or see things for yourself if you don't look on the other side of the journey you want to take. 

I am very set and focussed on what I want to achieve and sometimes you have to be little generous towards people at a certain extent so they can trust and know that I am not running my business just for the money but it is because this will help me with my next business I am building which will be non profit but will be connecting and helping to build other people through my own skills I have taught and built myself. 

If you don't take the risks you will never know what is out there. I know I need to be more strict with myself when it comes to my customers paying me for example but I also want to build trust and  loyalty and see that I am not in it to just make money but I really feel this will my beginning to start a new journey and find out what I am really capable of doing. Also the people who are warning are probably doing it because they see fears from creating a business that is why they would never do it, but I know this is something I have been dreaming and is my blueprint in life to be my own person and boss. 

So next time someone warns you, do a pro and cons list, and write why you do not feel you should do it, if it is something you are adamant about doing and would like to find out if it will work I say go for it, but of course do your research speak to experts and others for market research to get different opinions or they may also like to give help by passing their own ideas to help. 

But remember you have the utter control to make the decision yourself.
Will it fulfil you in the short and long term if you take the risk, and run your own business for example?
If you don't will you be regretting it for the rest of your life, and beat yourself up because you never found out?

People have dreams and ambitions for a reason and if it something you constantly think about then the only way you are going to really find out if it is for you is by doing it, and taking the risk whether it is playing guitar or planning a new career. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X

Friday, 22 March 2013

Changing of circumstances

Changes if circumstances can knock your confidence, you have to cut down on treats for yourself or on things that I enjoyed. Today I had to decide on which one of my websites I should keep and decided to cancel my Sports and Fitness Action website.

I was really building this up but some times things just have to give.

So how do you rebuild from the knocks you face?

- Welcome the change and embrace it.

- Think of what will happen if you don't

I had to change as if not I could be out of pocket to pay my rent, my council tax etc, and home and my husband are my priority and so I had to make the choice.

I have discovered new ways of communicating via tweeter and facebook and I can use these instead to help me build a relationship with other people over the net and it has been great discovering and learning process.

I made a promise to myself that once I am certain of my new direction that I can rebuild what I had created on my Sports and Fitness website and I can use my blogs to do this in the meantime.

So how I am going to see the sports and fitness action website, I am going to see it as it was fro me to learn on how to build a website a foundation and has helped to build others and it will help to rebuild in the next chapter ahead.

Learning what is important in life keeps my feet on the ground and now when I have feelings of depression I have learnt to take action immediately to turn the negative into a positive outcome and I know that I have done the right thing even though there is that doubt and deep feeling of lose, because it was giving something up I enjoyed sharing.

Getting fit and taking part in sports has helped me build my confident and I have that to take with me so I haven't lost everything just the material side that can always be rebuilt. I still can go for a run and continue my fitness training as this has not taken this away, and as long as I have those things and my home, and my husband then this is what matters.

Plus also I can still blog about my Sport and Fitness.

Thanks for reading,

Carrie X